Talkin' NBC's "Outsourced" ... sort of

By PAUL RUSSELL
TV Talkin' Blog Staff Writer

This review of “Outsourced” will serve as more than that, as the show does not merit a lot of
attention and if I introduce myself and my methods now, by contrast with “Outsourced” they may
seem exemplary in comparison.

First methodology, I am not going to actually watch this show.

I mean to employ a kind of applied or theoretical science. Like chaos theory in mathematics that looks for trends or patterns in randomness or the Heisenberg uncertainty principle where fairly accurate but never precise assumptions are made about particles by the waves from an electron microscope, my methodology does not represent hard science.

I am going to look at the 2006 "Outsourced" movie and extrapolate. I will see an "Outsourced" commercial or media picture of the cast, and reason that if this slice of the show is this bad the trend of the whole show is bad.

If critics look at the show and hold up there nose as if smelling rancid curry, I could watch this show and lend precision to my own review but my own feelings would range from “horrid” to "unwatchable."

The good thing about TV or film criticism is it is not going to be far wrong. If something gets a C+, you might give it a D or a B but rarely an A or F. By all accounts “Outsourced” is an F that is “Plan Nine from Outer Space” bad that critics are enjoying firing off shots at like fish in a barrel. The idea of reviewing a show without watching it provides some insight into myself in that I frown on facts, they are often unamusing and get in the way of a better imagined scenario of events.

If “Outsourced” is bad, it can be examined the same way one looks at the Edsel or a roadside car crash or as a cautionary tale, studied like the "Fall of the Roman Empire."

The 2006 "Outsourced" movie I have seen and it was mildly amusing. It mined the realities of corporate outsourcing, cultural differences between east and west and a "Pride and Prejudice"-style love story with a hot Indian woman. If you are a studio exec weighing the merits of a show, you have elements here to work with.

Except the male lead is not endearing and has no backstory, the cultural differences are not examined seriously except for the most obvious retread jokes and no effort was put into examining corporate outsourcing in a serious way as this is a lighthearted network comedy.

Network TV will not have an unclothed hot Indian woman either. The movie had slight amusements and those elements have been removed. Season 2 of "The Wire" dealt with the decline of the American city in some detail and most fans of "The Wire" liked Season 2 the least and "The Wire" had a small fan base to begin with. So instead global economic trends are treated with whimsy, a “Dude, Where’s my Job?” for the small screen. I am confused how this show moved past the idea stage.

While “Outsourced” is of slim interest, I would like to introduce a concept of Top Five lists related in some way to what is being reviewed. This may be a crummy show but the top five list may point to something better.

Top Five Dramatic Productions Glamorizing Something Not Really that Glamourous:

1. "Annie" — Orphan is adopted by Daddy Warbucks. Lots of song and dance numbers in an
orphanage. I also like the name Warbucks, equating wealth and war.

2. "Miss Saigon" — A musical set in Vietnam, very romantic

3. "Rent" — The carefree existence of idealistic artists struggling with Aids and discrimination
against sexual orientation. Rent portrays life as gritty and unfair for these “artists”, so the
depiction is not unrealistic just glamorized as noble. Even white people try to stay health
and concern themselves with status in society, why are those issues more evocative to
artist?

4. "Dude, Where is my Car?" — Two hung-over white kids try to find their car and to order fast
food. See, white people have problem too.

5. "Roger and Me" – Oh wait, this was actual good. Before Michael Moore championed every noble left wing cause, this picture took a look at Flint Michigan, a town in decline due to a fading American auto industry. Michael Moore pursues an interview with GM CEO Roger Smith, a failed and pointless endeavor. Interviewing an auto CEO was not going to bring back the prosperous past or even secure a better future, but it was a sweet and non-glamorous endeavor in the vein of "Don Quixote." If you are interested in the human face of jobs moving across the globe or the American city, this is a good one to watch.

Top Five Lines of Dialogue Related to the Domestic Arts:

1. Wax On, Wax Off – "Karate Kid" blue collar martial arts training regime, long before "Kill Bill."

2. Out, Out, Damned Spot – Some kind of spot in some clothes that relates to a treacherous act, courtesy of Shakespeare. I would provide more facts here except I am not high on facts as mentioned earlier and high school English class was filled with English writers and American writers fancying themselves English was filled with scarlet letters and portraits of dorian gray and seven gables with scarlet letters on them, one metaphor representing the shame of masturbation runs together with the next metaphor.

3. Halluh! – Not precisely dialogue related to cleaning something, but in "Mrs. Doubtfire,"
plucky dad Robin Williams puts his face in a lemon merriange pie to maintain his undercover identity with Sally Field and he can stay close to his family. I would have liked Robin to choke on some pie crust in production, to spare us the afterbirth of the whole "Medea" Tyler Perry empire. If there is a "Top Five Worst Legacy" list in future, Mrs. Doubtfire would make my list.

4. <blank> - Did anything noteworthy happen in "Mr. Mom" or "Maid to Order?" How about "Mr.Belvedere," "Whose the Boss?" Or the Fran Drescher sit-com? I will do some research by
watching the "Whose the Boss" adult-themed parody.

5. "You scrub the elephant, then you wash the elephant. You wash it, then you scrub it." —This is a line of dialogue (or fairly close) by Hrundi V. Bakshi as played by Peter Sellers in “The Party”, a Blake Edwards comedy. If you are looking for ridiculous Indian related jokes, you should see this film. No one does absurd humor like Sellers and Edwards. The humor should be no less dated than in “Outsourced”.

So in summary, “Outsourced” is bad. I recommend the 2006 movie or "Roger and Me" or "The Party." Also, "A Passage to India" for east-west relations.